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Delayed Pregnancy Or Infertility-Childlessness?

1.0 Introduction

Delayed pregnancy/birth takes the form of prolonged infertility or childlessness. The examples listed below demonstrate known cases of infertility:

• Abraham and Sarah

• Isaac and Rebecca

• Jacob and Rachel

• Manoah and his wife

• Elkana and Hannah

• Zechariah and Elizabeth etc.

Delayed pregnancy/birth is catching many women off guard at an alarming rate. In our land today, many marriages are broken because they are considered childless or infertile. Couples run from one herbalist, spiritualist or hospital to another in search of the baby. It can tear apart families and lead to polygamous situations. Some even end up at Bar Beach, where they spend sleepless nights waiting for the mermaid’s spirit. They are willing to do anything, cash or in kind, to fulfill their heart’s desire. As a result, they are routinely cheated, maimed and killed. The problems that arise due to this situation are:

• Should childless couples pray for their children today?

• Whose fault is it?

• Did God cause it or did He know about it?

• Why did God allow Satan to let this happen to us?

• Will we get pregnant?

We will attempt to answer these questions in the final part of this article. Some people also use some medical knowledge, such as in vitro fertilization, to help couples without children conceive. Some believe that delayed pregnancy or sterility is God’s punishment for sin.

2.0 Know the facts about delaying childbearing

God may call us to faith in many ways, but it would be wrong to interpret childlessness as a curse.

Children are gifts that we receive from God if we ask for them. The answer may come from your own children, an adopted child, a ranger’s child, or a group of children from the neighborhood or church. Infertility can create an urgent crisis of faith for a couple. Infertility raises profound questions about the purpose of marriage, the value of marriage partners, and their sense of belonging in the Christian community.

Why do couples get married? Couples get married to enjoy sex, procreation (having children) and to support their partner in life. The purpose of marriage is not just to procreate. Therefore, if there is a problem of childlessness or infertility or delayed pregnancy, the marriage shall still be maintained according to the other purposes of the contract. But for most Christians today, the opposite is true. To them, childlessness seemed to improve their relationship with God, who wanted his followers to be like Christ, and that sometimes brought pain. Recognizing our ultimate goal of becoming more like Christ reminds us that marriage and parenthood are not our sole purpose in life. Having children is not the only purpose of our life. Some atrocities have been and are still being committed by some childless couples today:

• Sarah took matters into her own hands by offering Hagar to Abraham. She had a hard time believing God’s promises and waiting on the Lord.

Likewise, some of us encourage our husbands to take a second wife (Genesis 16:1-14) in order to have children at all costs. I will discuss this topic fully in my next article on Christian Divorce in a subsequent edition of this magazine.

In the Old Testament, a childless woman was considered a failure and a social embarrassment to her husband. The same is true for women today. Children are a very important part of the socio-economic structure and are the source of labor for the family as they take care of their aging parents. Some were forced to hand over their maids to their husbands or to marry other wives.

Husbands were allowed to divorce barren wives. These women shed tears of heartbreak at night. Things haven’t really changed since then.

3.0: A Typical Case of Delayed Birth

Many couples in the Bible endured long periods of infertility before finally having children:

• Abraham and Sarah were married seventy-five (75) years before Isaac was born (Genesis 16:1-4; 21:1-7).

• Isaac and Rebecca stayed twenty (20) years before Esau and Jacob, the fathers of Israel (Genesis 25:19 – 26).

• Jacob and Rachel waited eight (8) years for Joseph to be ruler of Israel (Genesis 29:31-30:24).

• It took Manoah and his wife several years to get Samson to judge Israel (Judges 13).

• Elkanah and Hannah spent several years before giving birth to Samuel who became the prophet of Israel (1. Sam. 1).

• It also took years for Zechariah and Elizabeth to get John the Baptist, the forerunner of Jesus Christ (Luke 1).

If the cases of Zechariah and Elizabeth were given due attention, they were both godly men, scrupulous in spirit and letter in keeping all of God’s laws, priestly by birth, from the Temple Service, aged but not child. We can, as cautiously as David, conclude that children are a gift and blessing from God, but not having children is not a curse but a failure of God to bestow a gift on couples (Psalm 127:3). Cases like the one mentioned above abound in our various fellowship centers and the longer cases have been replaced by adopted children.

4.0: some answered questions

Needing answers to some of the questions posed by childless couples, here are some answers as additional comments:

A sort of. Should childless couples pray for their children today?

Yes. Just pray and trust that God will answer your prayers. Children are a gift from God, and only God can give this gift, as He wills, to whomever He decides to give it to (Romans 9:15-16; Exodus 33:19). Those before us simply prayed and received their gift by faith (Genesis 15:7-8).

b. Whose fault is this?

It’s no one’s fault, especially if the relationship between you and your God is cordial, or a relationship between true friends. The fault, then, may be on the enemy, and if the childless couple understands this, it is their responsibility to wrest back from Satan the gift under their control (Matthew 11:12).

c. Was this caused by God or did God know this was the case?

God knew this situation and allowed it to happen in order to test the couple’s faith. After all, Abraham was tested, and so were Zechariah and Elizabeth. So why don’t you? (Luke 1:25).

d. Why did God allow Satan to let this happen to us?

As mentioned in the text, there is no biblical example of a barren, barren, or childless woman, except David’s wife – Saul’s daughter Michal, who despised or mocked her husband while he praised and danced And cursed to God by the husband (2 Sam. 6:16-23).

e. Will we get pregnant?

Yes. Childless couples have to conceive because someone else got pregnant before them. The word of God is always new among us. There will never be a barren woman among us (Deuteronomy 7:14; Genesis 18:14).

The author has been a fertility victim for seven (7) years and when God’s timing/decision gave us a free gift, we had a lively baby boy (a complete and well-designed gift to make us forget about the past Years of locusts, the perfect gift without any blemishes). During long periods of infertility, we resign ourselves to God, trust in His supremacy, and promise us this gift. But we never let up in prayer and fasting to apprehend and reduce the power of Stan and his demons who are being used as agents of torture, denying us God’s blessing, and creating misfortune in our marriage.After all this and God forbid we have a baby boy just like Sarah

5.0: Conclusion

We must realize that delayed pregnancy/birth is not the same as infertility or infertility, but many couples rename it as infertility or childlessness out of ignorance or impatience. Recall that all the women mentioned in the Bible, namely Hannah, Sarah, Rachel, Elizabeth, Rebecca, and Manoah’s wives, all had children of their own after all. Apart from the case of David’s wife (Michal/Saul’s daughter) which is a curse, there are no instances of infertile women in the Bible.

When things like delayed pregnancy happen in our family, we often ask “Whose fault is this?” and “Why did God allow this to happen to me?”. However, Paul had a similar case at 2 Cor. 12:7-9 God who knew the situation replied, “My grace is sufficient for you”. Since then, Paul has never brought up the issue again. In this case, the first thing to understand is that God allowed it to happen, not caused it to happen. If we don’t have these problems, and if those before us did, how can we tell the goodness of God to those around us? Remember, without testing, we wouldn’t have any testimonies in our lives.

Anyone who wants to become like Christ must be prepared to suffer. If we recognize our ultimate suffering to be like Christ, we will remember that marriage and procreation are not our true purpose for creation. Having children will not get us to heaven, or even to maturity in Christ. Therefore, our pursuit of children at all costs should not be as emphatic as the worldly people.

Once childlessness or delayed pregnancy is recognized as part of a couple’s struggles in life, the grief of childlessness must end, so the couple begins to meet needs around them that they have hitherto neglected to attend to. They can turn their desire for children over to God. They are available in church and fellowship centers as church teachers, counselors, youth workers, friends and confidants.

In the end, childless couples need to give up their faith and trust God completely. Also, here again the need to be joyful in all circumstances must be emphasized (Philippians 4:4-6), because only those who rejoice in the Lord can overcome obstacles. Let us resolve to bear the cross God has prepared for us and accept His sufferings as we accept His gifts to us (Matthew 16:24; Mark 10:28-30).

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