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6 Months Without Sleeping Through the Night
My baby is 6 months old and I hope he is getting some sleep now. Unfortunately, he still wakes up in the middle of the night, usually 1-2 times. I’m thinking the reason is he’s hungry, but I’ve read a lot about it and I think he’s used to falling asleep on his breast.
Obviously each of us wakes up several times during the night, but babies are different from us in that they need to learn how to fall back to sleep on their own. All babies will do this on their own at some point in their lives, but, since you never know when it will happen, it’s best to teach them ASAP, or I should say ASAP. In my case, my baby uses the breast to put himself back to sleep and I am now on a mission to teach him how to put himself back to sleep.
The first thing I plan to do is take a closer look at my baby’s sleep habits; when he wakes up, when he naps, and when and when he wakes up during the night. That way I can better understand his sleep patterns.
My baby’s bedtime routine is bath, read, and feed before bed, and he usually falls asleep while feeding. I decided to change this habit as it reinforced his dependence on the breast to fall asleep. His new bedtime routine will be: feed, bath and read before bed. Putting your baby in the crib while he’s awake will help start the process of learning how to fall asleep on his own.
The next question is, what do I do next? I’ve been talking to a lot of mothers, and everyone has a different idea of what’s best. I think that, like many things in parenting, it’s a very personal decision, and even if there’s one right decision, it’s almost impossible to determine which one it is.
“Let the baby cry to sleep by itself” method. I don’t like the “method” which is basically letting the baby cry until he falls asleep. It might work for some parents, but I find it needlessly cruel.
There is another method called “Ferberizing”, named after the man who proposed it: Dr. Richard Ferber. You put your baby to sleep, and if he cries, you leave him alone for 5 minutes, then go into the room after that time, pat him and leave the room again. Next time you let him cry for 10 minutes, then continue the technique by letting him cry for 5 more minutes until he falls asleep. I don’t like letting my baby cry, I know some people might think I’m a weak mom and the baby is controlling me, but I don’t think it’s fair to him. Crying is the only way he communicates with us, what message are we sending him if we ignore him when he cries?
There is another method called “system awakening”. It doesn’t sound like much fun, but at least it will save you from having your baby cry for hours. First, you’ll need to keep track of the times your baby wakes up during the night during the week. Once you know your baby’s routine, you’ll want to set the alarm for about a half hour before you want him to wake up. Once the alarm goes off, you get up (this is the “less fun” part), you have to wake the baby (this is the “less fun” part) and do what you normally do when he wakes up naturally. wake him up? Poor little thing, really? He looks so peaceful when he sleeps, I don’t know if I can do that. For those who can, you need to anticipate each usual waking in the same way, gradually increasing the time between wakings. In this way, within a few weeks, you can eliminate them.
So, after considering all the different options, I’m going to try something that simply reinforces the sleep rhythm. The main thing about this method is that you never let your baby become overtired. I’ve seen my baby overly tired many times, he acts like he’s ready to party all night (my partner likes this because he really thinks he wants to play) when in reality he’s ready for bed hours ago up. This approach shows that when you can anticipate your baby’s natural sleepiness and put him to sleep in the right environment (in my case, that meant sleeping in his crib undisturbed) he will fall asleep easily. One thing I need to change is my response to my baby waking up at night, instead of feeding him, I respond to him for reassurance, but let him fall asleep on his own.
Good night, sleep well
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