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50 Ways to Screen Your Lover
When it comes to romantic expertise, most of us are pretty much like weather forecasters. We are wrong more than half the time and still think we are capable. That’s fine with the under-25s, for whom changing lovers is a fashion statement.
Yet those of us mature lovers know that blind dates can be a sad, messy waste of time. So now… prudent efficiency has to be the way we work. We must resolve to approach our love lives with a mission-oriented mindset. We finally have an orderly professional life and have to recognize that the exuberance of adolescence doesn’t work when it comes to romance.
Our quest for a truly compatible partner must happen from the head down, not the crotch up. We must focus. In order to focus, we have to know what we want from the door. In love…not planning is planning failed.
Since none of us have read countless didactic self-help books, I’m happy to share this succinct lover’s guide.
Not enough motivation. We need new rules. We need a lover’s handbook, if you will, to help us navigate these murky waters.
So now… finally, here are 50 killer questions to help you identify or reject a potential love. Please – don’t thank me, send us dollars directly – euros and renminbi are also ok.
To further simplify things, I have grouped these queries into 5 categories.
Yes, now you can dramatically improve your chances of success in less than 30 minutes by thinking about my amazing insights. You don’t have to say amen! I promise I don’t have a white suit.
What I share is gleaned from years of therapeutic intervention, and of course my own personal trials and tribulations.
“Everyone is a fool, without exception” is an appropriate soundtrack for those of us who are a little bit unlucky in love. The idea is to remove the element of luck from our quest for romantic happiness.
I should add that I have spoken to many hungry hearts; who said they really didn’t need to go too deep or be too proactive in finding their life partner. They say they’ll recognize their “soul mate” by the sparkle in their eyes, the music in their voice, the smoothness of their steps, and more. Some people believe that God will simply save their partner. To these optimistic lazy lovers, all I can say is – no to Prozac.
This quick guide is not for short-sighted dreamers; but for those of us who have suffered from Cupid’s wild slings and arrows. We are rooted in reality and know there is no magic carpet for love.
5 Basic Categories of Survey: Self-Awareness, Empathy, Mental Stability, Financial Stability, Overall Health
1. How has your family life affected your views on relationships?
2. Who is the central figure in your life in terms of your spiritual/personal development?
3. How important is ethics to you?
4. What are your sources of moral/spiritual inspiration?
5. What are your relationship goals?
6. What are the top 5 deal breakers?
7. What have you learned from past relationships? The good and the bad.
8. Are you looking for a replacement for a lost love?
9. In your opinion, is a relationship a merger or a tender offer?
10. When the stakes are high, do you prefer negotiation or manipulation?
1. Do you usually pay attention to love?
2. Do you tend to anticipate your partner’s reactions when conflict arises?
3. Are you a patient listener?
4. Are your partner’s feelings/viewpoints important to you?
5. How important is it to you to win a lover’s argument?
6. Do you accept the notion that we all have bad days and should indulge once in a while?
7. Would you like to expand your erotic palate?
8. Is your idea of the romance game set in stone?
9. Have past disappointments made you defensive about your ability to be a caring person?
10. Do you think it is a good idea to share emotional trauma from the past?
1. Did you have a happy childhood?
2. Are you happy in your adult life?
3. What is your greatest stress?
4. How do you cope with stress?
5. Do you have a history of substance abuse?
6. Do you have any gender issues related to your sexual orientation?
7. Have you ever had clinical depression?
8. Have you ever been imprisoned or convicted of a felony?
9. Are you satisfied with your life achievements?
10. Are you prone to physical abuse?
1. What have you done to secure your financial future?
2. Do you think financial security is important?
3. Do you think couples should work together to achieve financial goals?
4. Do you find questions about your finances too intrusive?
5. Have you ever filed for bankruptcy or repossessed a car?
6. Do you consider yourself financially stable?
7. Are you a gambler?
8. Do you have your own house?
9. Are you financially sophisticated?
10. What is your FICO score?
1. How important is physical fitness to you?
2. How often do you exercise?
3. What is the nature of your exercise?
4. Do you have major health problems such as diabetes, heart disease, and high blood pressure?
5. Is healthy eating important to you?
6. How often do you eat fast food?
7. Do you struggle with weight/have an eating disorder?
8. Do you have sexual dysfunction?
9. Are you taking any medications?
10. What is your height and weight…really?
Now, some of these issues really require King Kong’s cheekiness. But admit it, you really want to know these details before committing serious time and effort. So now you can put it in there as a fun exercise. Our mature lovers hate wasting time – don’t we now? Think of this handy quiz as a time-saving checklist. Have fun and filter carefully!
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