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Warning Signals to Be Aware of in a Nanny
Hiring a nanny is not like an employer bringing in an employee. Although a nanny will see your child or children at their best and worst, they still have to love that child. A nanny will see your household in turmoil as well as at the parties. A nanny should actually become a trusted and loved member of the family. A nanny should be there for the long term for your child’s greatest benefit. You go through the interview process and you get almost all the green lights. Just keep your eyes open for several months and be extra aware of the nanny and your child’s behavior. Remember, in this current job drought, someone may not necessarily apply to be a nanny because she loves children but because she is desperate for a job.
1) If your toddler starts crying when you’re about to leave, that doesn’t necessarily reflect on the babysitter. Youngest children are attached to their mothers. When babies are several months old, they begin to distinguish between family members and strangers and feel somewhat afraid of people they do not recognize. They may shed a few tears when the parent is about to leave, but this subsides as they get older or they get used to the individual. Because you can decode your child’s cry, you can often tell if they are crying out of fear or if it is just a normal cry. However, be careful to return home unexpectedly and see what happens after you leave.
2) No link yet. What if baby and nanny have been together for six months and still haven’t bonded? What if the toddler dislikes the nanny or the nanny is easily irritated by the child’s behavior? It could be a sign of trouble. It’s important for baby and nanny to have the right chemistry to make it work. There should also be a bond with your family. After all, if she’s staying long-term, she’s around your family for countless hours.
3) Is it difficult for you and your help to work together smoothly? Your personal relationship with your nanny is very important because you have to trust her with your child as well as everything in your home. Beware of a nanny who is moody or doesn’t talk; she may hold bad feelings towards you, which in turn will affect the way she treats your child. For example, if she chooses not to follow your instructions, especially about things that are important to you, or if she criticizes how you raise your child, this could be a dangerous signal. Although you should welcome constructive feedback, a disapproving, bossy nanny is never pleasant to work with.
4) Does your help invite people to your place when you are at work or out of town? Your place is her workplace and should be treated with respect just like an official workplace. The problem with bringing people into your home when you are away, especially relatives, boyfriends or her own children, is that it becomes too easy to neglect the work and supervision that is supposed to be done. In addition, she should respect the privacy of your home – it is your castle.
5) Does nanny follow schedules? If she doesn’t live in your house, then she should arrive a few minutes before her call time. She shouldn’t have to make regular excuses for why she has to be late or why she has to have an extra day or two off. Of course, there are always important events or emergencies that you need to be generous with; just don’t take advantage. A good caregiver must also observe routines, with eating, sleeping and bathing. If this is not the case, she may be unreliable in the long run.
Here’s a terrific long-term relationship with a nanny who will become a beloved part of your family.
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