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Women’s Month – Reclaiming Beauty, Redefining Success

Women’s Month- Reclaiming Beauty, Redefining Success

It was like cold water slapping my face. The first time I watched it made me uncomfortable. The second time, I cried. Now I’m all fired up with positive energy about healthy feminine power and want to share that with you.

“It” is a 60-second video on CampaignforRealBeauty.com. Go to “Evolution movie” and click watch the movie (please note: I’m not talking about the pro-age video that automatically plays).

You will see that this film represents a form of violence against girls (and women) that we need to be more aware of.

Research* reveals the good, the bad and the…

o Dr. Susie Orbach discovered that spending just three minutes looking at fashion magazines lowers the self-esteem of 80% of women.

o Distorted expectations and pressures of physical beauty affect self-esteem. This leads to introversion, withdrawal from normal life and waste of potential.

o 6 out of 10 girls think they “would be happier if they were thinner”

Like many of you, I remember being a young girl, cruelly teased about my appearance almost every day at school. Now I can appreciate that this encouraged me to develop my intelligence and other talents. Today my heart goes out to any girl who feels discouraged by media pressure that feels more intense than my youth. (In my twenties a friend encouraged me to get a nose job, which helped remove a stumbling block to my confidence.)

Good news*:

o 87% of women agree that “a woman can look beautiful at any age” and 81% agree that “every woman has something beautiful about her.”

o 75% of women agree that beauty does not come from her appearance, but from her spirit and love of life.

Author and feminist, Naomi Wolf says, in 1991, most American women still felt bad about not looking like the thin, blonde Barbie with big breasts. She writes that now women “DO see themselves as beautiful when they are loved or engaged in meaningful activities, involved in spiritual experiences, helping others or doing creative work.” Wolf astutely points out that when women no longer concern themselves with “external shortcomings, they can act in powerful ways with their inner development and creativity.” I would add, and thus be able to wake up inspired and make a difference in the world while feeling more in love with their lives.

This leads us to not only challenge what defines beauty, but what is true success?

Studies show that 80% of professionals say that balance and fulfillment are top priorities. However, in real life, they still do not experience enough balance or meaning. Professionals come to me seeking their higher purpose for much more than just higher salaries.

There is a healthy revolution in the making – towards becoming whole and experiencing harmony between who you are deep inside, and how you function in the outer world. “Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” has a renewed echo in our hearts for the 21st century. The first feminist initiatives were about “Life” — I exist. I have a say in the world. I count and get a vote. “Freedom” coincides nicely with the push for the freedom to pursue financial independence and equal opportunity to compete for the corner office. Now, we have a great opportunity to renew “The Pursuit of Happiness.” Let’s pray that we are wiser about what “happiness” means and realize that she who dies with most toys probably spends too much time on eBay.

More women are willing to redefine success to include wellness, spirituality and meaningful work rather than sacrifice these elements by trying to climb ladders and compete in ways that are often out of sync with her true nature. Who wants to keep pushing to break through a glass ceiling if it leads to more stress and a broken spirit? We are on the threshold of redefining success and reclaiming joy.

One of my clients, a 40-year-old television producer, says this way, “I define my own success now. I used to put a lot of energy into pushing the next promotion, competing and getting caught up in what everyone else thought was success. Now I gave up hunting in favor of searching. I realize that, yes, you can have a fulfilling job, be a mom, and not kill yourself — as long as you define success yourself.” Rather than pushing online executive titles, she is now more interested in making a difference in the lives of others, especially education for girls.

If you are reading this, you are a person of power. You have choices to make and a voice to use toward a world that works for all of us. What would you like to experience for your own unique story of joyful success?

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