What To Do With A Three-Year-Old On A Friday Night The Three Hearts of a Japanese Man

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The Three Hearts of a Japanese Man

Well it’s Friday night and I’m pretty sure my friend Tabata-san was hanging out at the usual place. So I decide to go talk and maybe have a beer too.

Sure enough, I find him sitting with a couple of young men telling them what it was like to be a Jew in the old days.

I’m patiently waiting for an opening in the conversation, because I want to ask Tabata-san to talk more about a previous topic. His experience of being Japanese.

Before I have a chance to ask, Tabata-san reads my mind and begins to tell the two young men what we discussed last time. Soon, the conversation follows in him talking about “the three hearts of a Japanese”.

“You see,” he said, “Being Japanese is not a simple matter, though life would be more enjoyable if it were.”

“To make my way in the world, I myself, and I believe most Japanese men of my age, find it necessary to keep and nourish three hearts instead of just one.”

“The first and most important heart that I have is my private heart. The feelings that I hold in this heart, I do not share with anyone. With the exception of when I drank too many beers.” he says with a wide smile suddenly appearing on his face.

“I rarely share my true feelings with anyone, because doing so would only tend to cause complications and misunderstandings. This is a reality of life that most every Japanese person realizes and lives with over time.”

“My second heart” Tabata-san says after a short pause, “Is my business heart.”

“This is the heart that enables me to earn a living and make my way in the world.”

“At work, you soon realize that your superiors are not interested in hearing what you hold in your heart. When your boss asks you ‘What do you think about this idea?’ what’s most important is that you save him from the embarrassment of making a mistake. So almost always you say, ‘Wow, what a great idea!’ If you’re really smart, you’ll be able to correct the weaknesses in his strategy while he thinks he’s come up with the changes.”

“Freedom of speech, as it is guaranteed in the US constitution, is granted in Japanese business circles only after consuming a few beers. Drinking gives you the opportunity to share some of what you have been hiding. Everyone understands that whatever you say to your boss while drinking, is forgiven and forgotten the next day. Or at least that’s the way it is in the company I’ve worked in for the last thirty-eight years.”

Tabata-san pauses to see if we’re still interested, and when I nod enthusiastically, he continues.

“Finally, I am left with my family heart, and I take care of this heart only after taking care of the other two.”

“With my family heart I speak the words, bear the responsibilities and fulfill the tasks to which every good husband and father is aimed. What is most important in this regard is to maintain the spirit of support and hard work that will lead to my children to do. good in the world. I’m usually too busy and tired to do all that much with my family, but that’s rarely a problem because I have my wife to tell me what to do and say, and when.”

“Well, there you have it.” Tabata-san said, “Charlie-san you invited me to explore the rewards of sharing my private heart, and I have to say that I’m still worried about being misunderstood or ridiculed. But you’re right, it’s pretty amazing to discover most of the people around me, have the same hopes and fears as I do!”

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